Crawford, Texas - Revolutions are only allowed outside city limits (and this isn't one of them)

How the hell did I get out here? Odder still, how is it that my IBM typewriter is able to pick up a wireless signal out here in this postmodern dustbowl?
No, wait, if I only get one question I'd rather know how I got into this bath tub-left-for-the-wolves here in this dirty ravine where I have now awakened, finding my left leg tucked so economically beneath my body that its slumber appears to, in fact, be a coma.
That's right, folks, Romulus here, reporting from "Camp Casey" just down the road from the "Western White House" with my cohort Remus the bath tub.

Wait. before I can do this I require some sweet and glorious brew. I hate to be one of those who sings praises to coffee, but these typewriters require us to push down quite a bit harder than the computers of this golden age. Besides, it's in my contract! Ok, I'll be back with the truth and maybe some photographs if I can find a USB connection on this dinosaur. What this means is that once again I'll be stealing pictures from the AP.

Ciao for now